un: cantilena

[windsongs]

This might be a weird question but bear with me. I think some of us remember having a life before the one we've supposedly lived in Crane City or beyond. But does anyone remember dying? Literally dying or being led to believe you have.

I won't ask the specifics. You don't even need to tell me your name if you don't want to. Death is a very personal thing and one of the first things they teach you in my profession is to avoid asking direct questions about the event itself. But I've been turning the possibilities in my head and even the reincarnation angle doesn't really fit. If you've got any insights or ideas I'd love to hear them. Or if you know anything about the afterlife/netherworld in general. Either way, let's swap notes.

Comments

un: abyssprincess

[unalign]

[ she hates her un but w/e, the word netherworld is much, much more important than the un this life of hers has created ]

Storms, rude home invaders, getting thrown into prison—

I can't say I'd like to do it all over again.

[windsongs]

[ It's only speculative until proven, and well. She has some experience in this field. ]

no. just a normal person surrounded in supernatural circumstances

they may have only been superstitions in your world
but for some of us here they're very real. I get it thought
I've met at least one ghost who didn't believe they existed until I've had to break the bad news
so this isn't the first time I've had this conversation with someone

[windsongs]

[ Wait a second, she recognizes that name. From two different sets of memories. Well, that's unsettling. ]

that makes two of us
if I never have to think about that place it'll be too soon
it's bad enough I have a constant reminder to look at...

how much do you remember of that place?

[unalign]

[ that makes the two of them. lumine smiles wryly, her eyebrows furrowing. ]

Not a bad reminder, is it?

It's a little difficult to explain, to be honest. You could say that my memories of the Netherworld is sandwiched between my other memories of the world I was previously in.

[windsongs]

let's just say it left its mark mentally and physically

that's interesting. it's not quite my memories are stored
indexed?
idk anyway
the memories of this lifetime feel really distant. there are details I feel like I should remember or faces I should recognize but I don't
but at the same time I knew a "cousin's" name and felt an immediate connection to him

or you
it feels like we're best friends but I know that's fake

[unalign]

Well, who's to say that those memories are fake? Perhaps we've inhabited a body that's already lived a life and we've simply ... taken over.

[ because her own memories are all jumbled together, overlapping but at the same time separated from each other. ]

I remember returning to the previous world I was in before the Netherworld and Stygia.

What do you make of that?

un: rikarin

[heartshots]

so how did you die?

[ Rika you can't just ask people that!! ]

[windsongs]

that's not really something you just ask somebody
it's bad manners

[heartshots]

aren't you basically asking abt the same thing?

[windsongs]

I'm not asking the how. just if anyone else remembers dying
death is a very personal thing and going into the specifics can be very triggering for some

but to answer your question, I don't know
my memories on that are really hazy

[heartshots]

i don't think death is the end in every place anyway. or blah blah blah parallel universes or something but idr doing anything that would make me die

[windsongs]

[ That's... honestly not anything she's considered, but it's entirely plausible. She's going to try to not think about the possibility that she evicted some other soul from this body. ]

I don't know
the last thing that I can vividly remember is seeing Stygia blanketed in snow
if I returned home between then and now I don't have any memories of it

[windsongs]

it isn't but there are those out there who don't want to talk about their own deaths
something to keep in mind

[janescayre]

[Whereas Fukawa's first taste was being flung into Stygia and humiliated tenfold. Oh to have never perceived at all...]

Well at least someone's prepared. My friend claimed she was possessed by a ghost but I'm half-sure she just said that to freak me out. It's her fault I couldn't sleep alone in the dark anymore, and now places like these just make those nightmares real.

How the hell are you dealing with this so calmly? Every day I wake up expecting to be hexed into the shape of some foul creature, or trip over a curse that melts my skin off, or encounter some man-eating magic beast that'll rip me apart. It's untenable. People weren't meant to live like this. Reality was horrifying enough by itself, now we've got to throw in witches and youkai and vengeful ghosts?

🔒

[windsongs]

[ Fukawa please get better friends.

There's a part of her that wonders if she should just toss out some self-depreciating joke like she always does (or maybe a 🤷‍♀️ and be done with it). But the fact that this girl is legitimately freaking out about the whole thing, hooo. Okay. Time to send a privated message. ]

so if I find out you tell anybody about this I'll put in a special request with one of my spirit friends to pay you a visit

[ No you won't, Hibiki. ]

but part of that is true. I've been a magnet for the weird and unexplained for as long as I can remember. probably a lot longer
even if you don't know or understand why things just happen around you, you get kinda desensitized to it

but I had to learn when I was really little to keep any big emotions in check
so it's not that I'm completely calm all the time
but bad things happen when I don't keep myself in line. and that's not the whole "you wouldn't like me when I'm angry" trope you see in media

literally
*bad things will happen*
especially if I can't keep my tone AND emotions in check

also wtf who does that to somebody?? seriously
you need better friends

[unalign]

[ well, who knows really. but it's a possibility, isn't it? ]

I also remember Stygia covered in snow.

[ and existential conversations with certain individuals. ]

But I remember returning to Teyvat and being able to continue with my journey.
At least, until I was brought again here.

[heartshots]

well yeah if some1 refuses 2 answer it isnt like im gonna push it

[windsongs]

do you know how long you were there?
in Teyvat I mean

for all I know I went home too
but for some reason I don't remember it at all
I definitely don't like that thought but right now having an open mind is probably a good idea

[windsongs]

good idea
trust me, you don't want a vengeful spirit situation on your hands
and think about it this way

if you were dead and angry about it, you'd wanna lash out at someone poking at that right?

anyway lecture over
you still wanna know what happened?

[unalign]

A few months, I'd say. I certainly remember meeting new people and learning more about my missing brother.

It's all we can have at the moment.
An open mind.

[windsongs]

that and a whole lot of questions

have you run into any "family" members yet?
if you haven't then be prepared for it to be even more jarring
I legitimately feel bad about my first encounter

[unalign]

No, not really.
My parents are always overseas, it seems. And for some reason, my counterpart in this world doesn't have a brother.

[ only child problems ]

[heartshots]

well yeah, i'm curious

🔒

[janescayre]

[Unfortunately it is her pal Komaru who needs better friends: the ghost was real and delivered vital information, Fukawa is just an idiot with a persecution complex.

Not that she's too stupid to understand the implications of a private message. Those are always juicy secrets or a vile threat. Or both? She squints at the screen. Spirit friends...was this person some kind of shaman? Necromancer? There's shockingly little to glean here, hardly worth going private over in a world where every other person can shoot laser beams from their eyes. Perhaps there was a contractual secrecy with their powers, or a secret identity situation. Maybe they had an enemy among the intergalactic refugees.]

Bad things as in a cruel and unusual twist of luck, or as in "spirit friends" rising up to wreak havoc? It's difficult to catch a drift that's riding on one ripple.

Are you summoning those things here? How angry do you have to get before something happens?

And don't say stuff like that, Komaru is just fine! Maybe the ghost crap was hard to swallow and she can be childish, but she's the only person alive I'd ever trust my life with! And she doesn't care what I smell like!

Just forget it, it was a stupid anecdote in the first place. I only meant that I don't have any experience with this stuff and I'm probably gonna get squashed by it sooner rather than later.

At least the city seems normal. It's that "virtual" world worries me.

[windsongs]

that's convenient
sounds like whatever brought us here decided to give you completely unrelated npcs for parents
better than having your boss as a step-dad

[ It's exactly as awkward as it sounds ]

making you an only child was honestly good for you
it's a clear "this isn't right" indicator